A lot has happened underground in my heart this summer, though I wasn't often sure if that were true. I see more and more this last couple of weeks that it was and is in fact true.
" And you will know a tree by its fruit." I don't often like the fruit that I bare. But God will finish the work that He began in us.
What fruit are you producing? Do you think that you are kind when in fact you are judging and holding on to bitterness towards or against someone? Maybe a dad who didn't treat you the way you should have been treated? A co-worker who hurts your feelings and rubs you the wrong way, everyday? Maybe you have an over bearing mother who has robbed you of your masculinity leaving many things unanswered. Perhaps when you were a little girl your mother didn't invest as much as she could have in certain areas and your dad didn't make you feel as beautiful as God sees you.
Whatever 'unique to you' situation you are in. What is the fruit that you produce? When pressed what comes out? or say you go a while with out going through anything hard and you get a little wrestles, what starts to show up in your life.
Most people whether we mean to or not, on some level rebel against the way their parents raised them, lasting through high-school and if not manned-up to into the rest of there life. We all know examples. Tomboys raise princess' as little girls and say that they are totally fine unscathed by there childhood of actually wanting to be acknowledged as beautiful
(these are generalizations ), over-bearing mothers raise boys who can be more feminine than the college jocks(who have a whole other set of rebellious tendencies), absent fathers produce 'approval seeking' children and on and on and one of these overlaps the other and some of these have made us stronger or weaker and so on.
The two thing that I am nailing down(in a Kyle-rant sort of way) is what fruit do we see in our own life? better yet what fruit do other people see in our life AND what undelt with issues do you have that you would pass onto your children because you aren't dealing with them but instead you just think that you would be protecting them from the pain that you felt by doin 'A,B or C...' Or unowned issues which lead us to hiding or indulging in symptoms.
Here is the moral of the story. We all have the junk. Either we can play like we don't, only fooling ourselves, because I assure you we see them... or we can lean into Jesus, scripture and community freeing ourselves from the anxiety of hiding for fear that we will be 'discovered.'
Lets lean into Jesus. I choose to lean into you and I urge you like some of the worlds finest say to," lean back a lean back..." haha ok I know that I am a dork, it is a childhood issue that I am working out.
Ciao for now
